The Jones' Apartment...

Located in downtown LA, this is the pad of celebrity and former superhero sidekick, Rick Jones and his wife, Marlo. Rick seems to like causing trouble. When he was a teenager, he accidentally wandered onto the Gamma Bomb test site. He was saved by a scientist...who later turned into the Hulk. Then Rick became Captain America's new sidekick. Next, he was lured to a strange Kree military complex located on Earth and became involuntarily bonded with the hero known as Mar-Vell. After an encounter with the Supreme Intelligence, the repository of all Kree knowledge and technology, Rick's innate psionic potential all humans carry within them was unleashed.

After Mar-Vell succumbed to cancer, Rick was on his own again...until his "Destiny" powers resurfaced, causing a massive cosmic battle that took place in other times. Rick was then involuntarily bonded with Genis, the artificially engineered son of the late Mar-Vell.

That's pretty much all you need to know. Oh yeah, Marlo died once and she used to be a porn star! Hoo hah!

Rick kicks open the door, carrying his wife over the thresh-hold. "Aw, Rick...just like our wedd--WMHP!"

Rick and Marlo squirm on the floor, trying to get up. Rick smiles shyly, "I tripped."

"Klutz!" Marlo says, slapping Rick upside the head. Marlo looks around the apartment, "Holy crap, this place is a mess!"

"Well, what do you expect from a bachelor?" Rick asks.

Marlo sighs as she picks up some dirty whitey-tighties off the kitchen table, "Rick...," Marlo whines.

"Oops, that's not the hamper!"

Marlo flings the underwear in Rick's face, "Oh. My. Lord," Rick yelps, trying not to touch the underwear as it hits the floor. Marlo plops down on the couch and turns on the television.

{{"Tonight on the E! True Hollywood Story, Rick Jones: The Talent Pool Is Dry--"}}

"Um...Rick?"

"Cool, I'm on TV again," Rick says smiling. His smile quickly fades, "Wait...sonofa! E! True Hollywood Story is the bad one! DAMN IT!"

Captain America is seen on the screen, expressing his thoughts on his former sidekick, {{"Well, the alcohol abuse really upset me..."}}

The screen shifts to a home movie re-enactment with a much younger Rick singing Love Shack with a bottle of brandy in his hand. Oh, and he's naked. {{"Love shack! Baby, love *hic* shack......baby......I think I love you...Wild Thing! You make....my *hic* ow, heart sing....*hic*..."}}

Rick laughs, looking at his wife's surprised face, "I seriously did not do that. I didn't know Cap videotaped me while I was drunk."

"That's because it's a re-enactment, Rick," Marlo says.

Rick stands silent for a couple minutes, "Damn."

{{"Dr. Bruce Banner, an old friend of Jones, had this to say..."}}

{{"Wow...Rick Jones....um....just......hold on, I'm getting angry....I better go before I start throwing furniture....haha!"}}

{{"Marlo Jones, Rick's estranged wife, had this to say on their separation..."}}

"Marlo!" Rick squeals. "You actually let them interview you!? Damn!"

Marlo shrugs, "We were broken up at the moment. I was trying to promote my new movie."

{{"...that sick sonofa *bleep* better *bleep*in' accept that he can't *bleep* my *bleep* anymore. Hey, what the *bleep* are you *bleep*in' laughing at, camera man?!?"}} Marlo tackles the man as the camera is suddenly on the floor facing the interview couch sideways.

Rick, with his face shielded with his fingers, says, "Change the channel..."

Marlo clicks the channel button on the remote, surfing until she reaches a news story. "Ooo, this looks interesting!"

{{"Five to six strange unidentified crafts appear to be entering Los Angelino airspace--"}}

"Uh-oh," Rick says. "Genis? Marv? You there?"

"Yeah," Genis says from the Microverse. Because of his bond with Rick, he can't exist on the same plane of existence with him. They switch places between this miniature universe, composed of bits and pieces of other subatomic universes. "But I'm flying in the vacuum of space right now, I'll try to get to the closest planet with the most suitable atmosphere..."

"Argh! Marv! You're supposed to let me know everytime you leave one of those damn micro-planets!" Rick shouts.

"What's wrong?" Marlo asks.

"Genis is flying in Microspace right now, so we can't switch places, or I'll pop like a balloon out there," Rick says, peering out the window. He sees several strange pods entering the skyline.

Marlo approaches the window behind her husband, "Oh great...it's Independence Day all over again."

"Well, maybe these guys are peace--"

Dozens of explosions ensue as green energy blasts fire upon the damaged landscape of Los Angeles. A crazy mutant almost succeeded in destroying the entire city with a telekineitc-reinforced earthquake a few weeks ago.

*(Check out Cable #16-17 -- Brad)

"--ful?"

People run like mad as yellow lights envelop them, seemingly vaporizing them.

"You were saying?" Marlo says, hiding behind Rick.

"Alright, okay...Genis? Think you could hurry up a bit?" Rick shouts.

"Drozit! I'm already going 1,000 light years an hour, hold on!" Genis yells, obviously being strained.

Suddenly, the alien craft come closer and closer to the apartment building. "Rick?" Marlo squeals.

"Uh....run!" Rick shouts, darting for the door, grabbing Marlo. Rick's hand rushes to his forehead, he suddenly feels a surge of pain.

"What? WHAT?!" Marlo yelps, fearing for Rick's health.

"I'm fine...just a little headache," Rick says, swinging the door open, sprinting for the elevator with Marlo close behind. Suddenly, the entire building is rocked by an explosion, causing some ceiling material to fall on Rick's head, cutting him.

"RICK!" Marlo shouts.

"Keep going!" Rick yells. His eyes begin to glow. He looks at his shaking hands. Oh no...my Destiny powers....

"Your what?!?" Genis exclaims.

"You heard me," Rick says. "Hurry your blue ass up unless you wanna provoke another time-spanning war." *

*(Avengers Forever? Wha--? Brad)

Marlo is frantically waving Rick to come into the elevator, which is already being filled with other tenants. Before Rick can move, large insectoid creatures appear in the cluttered mess. The elevator closes before Rick can even see Marlo's face.

The aliens speak to each other in what appear to sound like clicks and humming as they brandish their energy weapons. The weapons appear to be "grown" into the aliens' forearms. One of them grabs Rick by his shirt collar.

"You recognize these overgrown stinkbugs?" Rick asks Genis.

"They look vaguely familiar, but the universe is big. I can't guarantee I'd remember every race I encounter."

The insectoids take hold of Rick, secreting a goo-like substance all over Rick's body, immobilizing him. "Aw crap...are they gonna probe me now?"

"Alright, I'm on some spacecraft. It's not a planet, but there's oxygen," Genis declares.

"Um...Marv.....?"

"Well, you'll have to be prisoner for the brief time you'll be here..."

"Marv?"

"And they might force you to do labor, like check the hyperdrive and clean the toilets..."

"MARV?!?!"

"What?"

"If you're done playing friggin' Captain Janeway over there...I can't move my body....ughn! Which means....I can't smash my Nega-Bands together," Rick says as he's being dragged up a flight of stairs. He hits his head on the railing. "OW! Damn aliens! Take an elevator! Intelligent life my ass...."

Soon, the aliens are on the roof. One of their craft hovers over the building. And the vaporizing yellow ray engulfs them all, Rick included...

Rick awakens in a strange environment that seems to look like the insides of a heart. "Am I dead? Most importantly....was my anus un-probed?" Rick asks groggily.

"I think you're on their ship," Genis says. "Damn carbon-stains! And what is with them dressing me like a maid?"

"Shut up, Genis," Rick says.

Suddenly, ten or more of the insectoids enter the room Rick is in. For the first time, Rick notices he's naked, and laying flat on his back on a slimy examining table. Weird tentacles are restraining his waist, wrists, and ankles to the table. "Aw dammit! Why couldn't you do the probes when I was unconscious?" Rick whines.

One insectoid points one of its three fingers of one of its six appendages at Rick's forehead, then again at his Nega-Bands. Its mouth seems to roar in laughter as a bunch of green things spew from it.

The alien leans in closer to Rick, speaking in broken English, "You.....are.....special....."

"Well, that's what my wife says."

"You....have......power....."

"Well, my friends are pretty powerful...sure, that makes sense. What else do you know? Let me guess...'I....have....brown....hair...'?"

"You.....will......die....."

"And another thing, what is with the slime--did you say die?"

"He said die, Rick," Genis says, while scrubbing the floor of a Microverse space-freighter.

"Shut. Up," Rick says between gritted teeth.

Rick winces as a laser gets closer and closer to his temples.

Elsewhere...

Marlo wakes up in a pool of slime. "Ugh...what the hell?" She notices she's in some sort of large green bubble.

"Well well well, what do we have here?" a voice echoes.

"Lorraine? Is that you?" Marlo asks of her "companion". The two actresses were never close when Lorraine was alive, but they've grown ever since she died...as conceited as that sounds.

"Yeah, it's me," Lorraine says, almost depressingly.

"I thought you disappeared," Marlo whispers. *

*(Check Marvel Fanfare #9 by yours truly -- Brad)

"I thought I did, too," Lorraine explains. "It seems I'm with stuck with you, much like your husband and daddy's boy."

"Well, at least I'll have someone to talk to," Marlo says with a smile. She checks the perimeter. "Where am I?"

"Some alien ship, I'm guessing," Lorraine says, lighting up a cigarette. She takes a small puff and blows the smoke out of the side of her mouth. "The entire LA population is in all of their ships."

"Whoa...that's like over six million people or so!" Marlo exclaims. "Where's Rick?"

Lorraine shakes her head, "Didn't see him, but I'm sure he's on one of the ships."

"He's gotta be on this ship, Lorraine. I want you to look for him," Marlo commands.

Lorraine rolls her eyes, "Why should I do that? Let the dead rest."

Marlo becomes livid, "Listen, you little snobby bitch! Since you're soooooooooooooOOOOoooooo busy what with being dead -- and not going anywhere fast, I might add -- I suggest you get off that lazy thing you call your ass and find my husband! Are there any questions?! I didn't think so!"

Lorraine flicks her cigarette on the floor and stomps away. She turns her head, "I'm a snobby bitch?"

Marlo's eye twitches, "I'd scream...but the sound would wreak havoc on my sinuses in this confined area....now just go. Where there's Rick, there's Captain Marvel. Where there's Captain Marvel, there's no such thing as city-kidnapping insect aliens."

"Yeah, yeah...," Lorraine mutters as she floats through a wall.

The Microverse - aboard the space-freighter, Hobbleschmek....

Genis scrubs the metallic floor of the main bathroom. He growls, "I hope you're happy. I'm doing this for you, Rick..."

A red-skinned alien suddenly appears before Genis, who is kneeling on the floor trying to use elbow-grease. "Uh ju kos fe mka ulow!?"

Genis gives the alien a blank stare, "I'm going as fast as I can, sir!"

"Uikoel?!?!?!"

"Sorry...I meant to say ma'am...," Genis says innocently.

"Having fun?" Rick muses.

Genis gives Rick's astral form a stupid look, "Yes...WHAT DO YOU THINK???? Moron...."

"Kiodop!?!?!?"

"I am not talking to you!" Genis yells at the mannish female overseer. "Here's an idea, why don't you clean your own damn ship!" He slams the rag on the floor and charges his nega-bands with photonic energy. The alien flees.

Rick sighs, "What are we gonna do?"

"Well, judging from those lasers the Mig-Na'cha were zapping you with--"

"You DO know who they are!"

"...yeah...it just came to me. Anyway, my guess is they are trying to tap into your Destiny powers, trying to experiment with it," Genis explains.

Rick gulps, "They said I was going to die..."

"Oh...then they're probably trying to turn you into a giant human psionic bomb."

"What?!?"

"I don't know, they've taken an interest in the Nega-Bands, too. If they take those off...and then try to bang them together...it could tamper with our molecular bond...possibly killing both of us."

"Well, they don't know what the nega-bands are capable of, yet," Rick says. "If only my hands weren't restrained....."

"Rick?"

"Yeah...?"

"This might be the cleaning fumes talking, but maybe you could use your psionic potential to free yourself?"

"Last time I consciously opened a can of psionic whoop-ass, I almost died," Rick objects.

"You don't need to fight, just loosen your bonds so we can switch places."

"Uh-oh..."

,/i> "What do you mean uh-oh?"

"Behind you."

Genis whips around to meet the barrels of many energy projectile weapons. "Olu pous hu fo kuh!"

"What'd they say?"

"Um...'prepare to die, psycho blue monster with shiny bracelets' I think."

"That sucks...."

"Yeah," Genis says, wincing as the guns' laser targeting aim for his chest, head, and...uh...special place. "This might sting...."