Joey Chapman

USAgent

Sabra

Silverclaw

Scarlet Scarab

Cybermancer

United Nations, a non descript meeting room

John Walker, known better to the world at large as U.S Agent, leaned back in a plush leather chair and kicked his feet up on the ebony table that he and his teammates were sitting at. Hanging behind him on his chair was his old red, black and white indestructible shield. Following recent events, Walker had been asked to once again wear his old uniform to remind the world, and himself, that he was an agent of the United States in both fact and name. The only change to his old uniform was that he now wore a riot gear helmet over his face, covering everything except his mouth, “Boy, this seems like a familiar scene, huh?” He asked his friends and teammates.

An amused look came across Union Jack’s face, even though it was concealed by a full mask, as he cleaned his pistol while Sabra and Darkstar just rolled their eyes. Hellios just looked at U.S Agent with a slightly bewildered look on his face.

“I’m not sure I understand, John.” Hellios confessed.

“I guess we never got around to telling you all about our first meeting as a team, huh? We basically woke up to a call from our government telling us to get our butts down to the local U.N building to catch a transport to the Heli-Carrier.” Walker explained.

“Not a lot of people were happy about that.” Union Jack added wryly.

“Ah yes, I do remember hearing a little about that.” Hellios replied, “I wonder where Savitar, Bridge and Honey Lemon are. I thought that all of Excalibur was brought under the United Nations’ direct authority.”

“Bridge is too loyal to SHIELD, Savitar has completed his sentence and asked to be reassigned to reserve status, and Japan requested the return of Honey Lemon.” A new voice explained. Excalibur turned to see a Caucasian, brown haired man in a dark blue military uniform with a blue beret atop his head. The officer had a manila folder tucked his left arm while a young woman with silver hair stood next to him, dressed in a similar uniform indicating military service to the United Nations

“How’d you know that, smurf?” Walker asked casually.

The officer removed his beret and smirked, “Because my name’s Joey Chapman, and I’m your new commanding officer, Mr. Walker.”

Sabra and Union Jack jumped as if they’d been shocked by electricity, instantly garnering the attention of the others.

“Blimey…” Union Jack muttered

“What’s wrong?” Darkstar asked Union Jack, while keeping one eye focused on Chapman.

“This bloke used to run with the Hellfire Club, a nasty bunch of people. Ran up against X-Force and Black Air. Though last I heard, he was filleted by the Shadow King’s X-Men.” Rock explained. He’d holstered his pistol, but kept his hand loose in case he needed to use it suddenly. It was a good instinct.

“I’ll admit that I’ve had conflicts in the past with Mr. Wisdom and Black Air that I will not go into,” Chapman stated evenly, “but that’s in the past. And before you all feel a sudden need to defend Wisdom’s honor, perhaps you’d like to see an example of his handiwork?”

Chapman opened the folder he’d kept tucked under his arm and withdrew several photos. The members of Excalibur looked them over, and even Sabra, a veteran in regards to scenes of brutality and torture, visibly blanched. So disgusted by what they saw, no member of Excalibur even thought to ask what the crimes of the men and women were in the photos. Chapman noted their reactions with approval before continuing, though he intentionally neglected to reclaim the photographs.

“At any rate, I’m not here to discuss the past. Excalibur, as you are well aware, has been reorganized. I am now your C.O, and I’ll be introducing you to your new teammates.” Chapman turned to his assistant, “Delphi, could you bring in Mr. Faoul?”

The young woman nodded, and exited the room. She returned with an Arabian man dressed in a scarlet body suit with a scarab over his right breast pocket. His hair was slicked back and he had a barely visible goatee developing on his chin. The man regarded the members of Excalibur with respect, though Sabra glared daggers at him.

“Excalibur, this man’s name is the Scarlet Scarab, chosen by the Arab nations to serve in Excalibur. He possesses super strength, energy absorbion, the ability to project force fields and flight.”

“I feel like a contestant on a bad American game show, Mr. Chapman.” Scarab commented as he strode forward to shake hands, “However, I believe that it will be a pleasure to serve in Excalibur, and I am happy to be here.”

Scarab politely shook the hands of each member of Excalibur. His handshake was firm and businesslike, but hardly intimating, nothing about it betraying the vast power that once held Thor at bay. Scarab came to a stop at Sabra, who kept her arms folded across her chest the entire time. Scarab left his hand extended for a long moment before allowing it to fall to his side.

“Sabra. A pleasure as always.” Scarab commented respectfully.

“Shouldn’t you be straddling a fence at home?” Sabra hissed.

Scarab sighed in slight disappointment, “As my teammate, and especially as a Jew, you are entitled to a certain amount of respect from me, something I will always strive to give you.” Scarab’s eyes narrowed, though his tone remained exactly the same, “Now that said, I will not be lectured about fences, by an Israeli.”

The two glared at one another for a moment, and the rest of Excalibur tensed in case the two Middle Eastern heroes decided to go at it, but Chapman decided not to give them the opportunity, “Delphi, could you bring in Ms. Endo?”

Walker’s ears perked up when he heard that name, “Did you say…?”

“Suzi Endo, AKA Cybermancer now, and reluctant representative of the Chinese government.” U.S Agent looked and saw a twenty something Asian woman wearing a very familiar purple and silver armor. The visor normally used to cover the armor wearer’s eyes was in the woman’s left hand, revealing her face, “Hey John, it’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

“Oh, yeah.” John said as he walked up to Suzi and gave her a friendly hug, “Too long. Sorry I lost touch after that mess with Force Works and whatnot. Good to see ya girl.”

“Thanks, John. Don’t worry about losing touch, we all have lives to lead. As you might not have noticed, I finished my armor.” Suzi replied, “Just in time to get drafted into Excalibur.” She grumbled.

“Ms. Endo will be our team scientist and provide field analysis as needed, among other things.” Chapman explained. Out of the corner of his eye, Chapman observed Union Jack shift uncomfortably, however slightly. Union Jack was trained to hide his body language, but no one was 100% perfect.

“Delphi, could you please send in Eshu?” Chapman requested

“…Eshu?” Agent repeated

“Named after an African trickster God.” Excalibur watched passively as Eshu entered. His appearance was that of a young black male, no older than twenty years with a bald head and yellow and blue uniform, “Says a lot a lot about me, don’t it?”

“I don’t know, does Eshu also translate into back stabbing bastard?” Walker spat.

“John? Have you had dealings with this man in the past?” Hellios asked.

“Not directly,” John replied, not daring to take his eyes off Eshu, “I did a mission in Genosha once. They gave me a quick briefing of bastards to keep an eye out for, and this guy was on the top of the list. Traitor who served those magistrate bastards without a second thought. Guess I shouldn’t be surprised he turned tail and ran when Magneto took over.”

“Gee, I never knew you cared that much about what happened in Genosha, Mr. Walker.” Eshu said casually, “Are you a Rightwinger or Leftwinger on the matter, if I may ask?” Eshu stated, deliberately emphasizing Rightwinger and Leftwinger. Agent snarled and lunged forward, only to be quickly restrained by Sabra and Hellios.

“Let me go! I’ll rip that bastard apart!” Walker roared as he struggled against his teammates.

“For all the good it would do you.” Eshu said casually as he examined his nails, unimpressed by Walker’s rage. A shot then rang out, startling everyone.

“Praise the lord for blanks.” Chapman commented as he holstered his weapon. Once again the center of attention, he continued his briefing, “Eshu is a omni morph, made up completely of unstable molecules. Not very powerful, but fairly versatile. Hopefully that will make up for his… demeanor.”

“Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence, boss man.” Eshu quipped.

“Eshu, you were forced on my team as an obscene political gesture by the African nations regarding the UN’s handling of Genosha.” Chapman explained unemotionally, “Let me state now, openly and for the record, I have no faith or confidence in you whatsoever. Delphi, could you bring in our last member?”

Delphi did as ordered, and returned with a short young woman dressed in what looked like a tribal leotard along with silver jewels and bracelets. The young woman kept her arms crossed in an annoyed manner.

“Hey, I’m Silverclaw, and I’m oh so happy to be doing my patriotic duty.” Silverclaw said with a roll of her eyes.

“Maria here is a animorph, meaning that she can assume certain aspects of animals while retaining, to a degree, her human form.” Chapman stated.

“Welcome to the madhouse, kid.” Agent commented.

“Hey, shape shifting is my bag!” Eshu protested flippantly while in the form of a circus clown, “What do we need little miss animal house here for?”

“Because if need be, Maria can track people via their scent. You can’t.” Chapman explained, “And I believe she has more potential in Excalibur than you will ever have. Now shut up. Does anyone have any questions?”

“Yes.” Hellios stated, “Who is leading Excalibur now that Bridge has returned to SHIELD?”

“I should think it’s obvious. The leader of Excalibur should…no…needs to have a back ground in intelligence work, quick-witted, creative and above all, intelligent.”

Sabra and U.S Agent both naturally perked up at hearing Chapman’s description of his ideal Excalibur leader.

“Therefore, I can think of no better leader than Union Jack for Excalibur.”

Percival Rock took a step back as he felt all eyes in the room fall upon him. Rock, however, was too smart to let gratitude override his caution and mistrust.

“Why me?” Rock asked suspiciously.

“I thought I was fairly clear the first time.” Chapman answered

“You were, and quite flattering too. But I also know you have…an issue with the man who gave me this uniform.”

Chapman shrugged, “Yes, that’s correct. With the man who gave you that uniform, not you. You stepped up to the plate when your country needed you. Hard to begrudge that, mate. And don’t act like I’m doing you any favors with this. As of now, the lives of your entire team now depend on you and your choices you make in the field.”

“Gee, no pressure there.” Silverclaw muttered under her breath.

“I know he’s up to it.” Chapman said without ever looking towards Silverclaw

“Congratulations, man.” Agent said as he slapped Rock on the back, “you’ll do a great job, man.”

“Agreed.” Sabra stated, “I can think of no better choice, other than myself, of course.”

“I’ve only known you for ten minutes, but you seem alright.” Cybermancer added.

“Why don’t all of you take the time to fix that?” Chapman suggested, “There are no missions as of yet lined up, so why don’t you get to know one another better right now?”

“I’m not sure I want to get to know some of these people better.” U.S Agent said while glaring at Eshu. Eshu morphed into a giant hand, and gave Agent the finger

“Too bloody bad. Stay here for the next two hours, and get to know one another. That’s an order.” Chapman commanded, before turning to leave.

England

There were times when Pete Wisdom wondered what he’d do without the HERMES teleporter that SHIELD so often employed. Not only was it strategic tool, but it also granted Wisdom access to just about every bar on the planet, a major plus as far as the former Black Air agent and unabashed alcoholic was concerned. That was a fringe benefit he’d enjoy during his all too few off periods, and today was no different. The reorganization of SHIELD was stressing beyond belief, and so it went without saying that Wisdom needed some type of relief.

So, naturally, Wisdom sought a drink every now and then to make it thru the day. He’d taken a seat on the far side of the bar so that he could see the door, and proceeded to order some whiskey. He had barely finished his first glass before a stunning, silver haired young woman (wearing a United Nations uniform, which Wisdom found a little odd) carrying two whiskeys approached him and purred, “Care to join me for a drink?”

“Whiskey and no ice? Sure thing, luv.” Wisdom smiled as he took the glass. Normally, Wisdom never took drinks from a stranger, but something seemed to override his usual inhibitions. Something about the woman’s perfume made Wisdom curious about her, even though Wisdom was faithful to his current ladylove, Lydia.

“So what brings you here, handsome?” the silver haired woman asked in a sultry voice.

“Just catching my breath. Long day at the office.” Wisdom answered after a sip. So enraptured by the woman sitting across from him, he failed to notice the United Nations uniformed officer who was approaching him as quietly and stealthy as a morning shadow, “What’s your name, by the way?”

“I’m called Delphi, Mr. Wisdom.”

Wisdom’s eyes widened in shock, but before he could divine how this beautiful woman knew his name, a hand shot out and grabbed his wrist and the back of his neck at the same time while a foot kicked the stool he was sitting on out from under him. Wisdom’s head slammed painfully into the bar before he’d even realized he was under assault, and thus was easily pinned.

“The drug in the whiskey will kill you instantly if you attempt to use your powers. And yes, I am well aware of your recent upgrade, Mr. Wisdom.” A voice whispered into the SHIELD agent’s ear. Wisdom raged when recognition came a split second later, and he began to struggle like a madman. The pressure disappeared, and the man who’d pinned Wisdom stepped back.

“Chapman,” Wisdom spat venomously thru gritted teeth, “how the bloody fuck are you here? Last time I saw you, I’d gutted your worthless arse.”

“Did you say ‘I’d’? Last time we met, you needed an entire team to back you up, including one of the most powerful mutants on the bloody planet. And you still couldn’t do the job right.” Chapman mocked, “And before that me and mine nearly had you. You remember our first encounter, Wisdom? I do. You took me out to a pub, under the guise of the whole ‘protective brother’ act you put on for your sister, who I had the misfortune of dating at the time. You drugged my drink, ambushed me with over a dozen Black Air agents and that Scratch bastard. You may have taken me down, but I know I left you pissing blood for a month.”

“And a half.” Wisdom thought to himself, “So what’s with the stroll down memory lane, and just how the hell did you survive what we did to you?”

“I have friends in very high places.” Chapman smirked. He’d half considered telling Wisdom about The Lady of the Lake, but knew that Wisdom wouldn’t believe him. And he wasn’t about to make Wisdom’s life one iota easier either, “As to why I’m here, well, turn about is fair play.”

Wisdom spared a glance towards Delphi, whom he noted had already disabled several men to prevent them from involving themselves in this little fight. A mighty impressive feat considering three of the men had at least two hundred pounds on the petite, silver haired woman.

“Don’t worry about Delphi, Wisdom. You’re all mine.” Chapman said with a wicked smile.

Wisdom took a moment to consider his situation. He had no doubt the drug given to him by Chapman would kill him if he used his powers, as he didn’t feel quite right is it was, and knowing Chapman, he couldn’t summon X-Force. So the only way out, if he was to be believed, was thru Chapman. And that was just fine with Wisdom.

“I’ve taken you out before, I’ll do it again. And this time, I’ll make sure I do it right.” Wisdom growled.

“If you can. No sneak attacks, no backstabbing, no lies. You and me, face to face, like real men. Think you’re man enough?” Chapman demanded as he pounded his fist in his open palm, “Your sister sure as hell didn’t think so.”

Wisdom didn’t even acknowledge the comment as he rushed forward with murder in his eyes. He struck out with a right, a punch that Chapman easily caught in mid swing with his left hand. With his free hand, Chapman struck Wisdom across the face with a blow that rattled Wisdom’s teeth, and brought his hand back with a loud slap! that drew blood. Chapman lashed out with a kick to Wisdom’s kidney that sent the spy tumbling backwards and to the floor, gasping for air.

“I may have let my combat skills slip when I was with the Hellfire Club, Wisdom, but I won’t make that mistake again.” Chapman explained as he looked down at Wisdom. Wisdom charged forward in a rage, and found himself flung into a table before he’d even seen Chapman move.

“But even rusty, mate, I’m still a master. You’re good Wisdom, very good in fact, but compared to me?” Chapman sneered, “Not good enough. England may not have the trouble spots that the States have, but Lambeth and Leeds would still chew you up and spit you out even with your powers, Wisdom. And Baron Blood and Grace? They’d have your garters for breakfast.”

Wisdom forced himself up again, his body screaming in pain and attacked again. He didn’t expect to be successful, he wasn’t about to lie down and die. Unsurprisingly, Wisdom went head first into yet another wooden table, only this time he didn’t get up.

“Had enough?” Chapman asked as strode towards the downed agent. Wisdom, though fully conscious (and in a good deal of pain), didn’t reply. He knew when to swallow his pride and when to start fighting dirty. He was a spy, first and foremost, after all. Deception and underhanded acts were his weapons of choice. Wisdom lay as still as possible while clutching his service weapon that had been hidden in his coat up until now. Wisdom tensed as he heard Chapman getting closer and closer, like a snake waiting to strike at an unsuspecting prey. Wisdom waited until Chapman was almost right on top of him, and then as quickly as humanly possible, rolled, aimed his weapon right at Chapman’s smug face…and then realized he was looking down the barrel of Chapman’s own pistol.

“Was the man to man thing too much for you Wisdom?” Chapman asked contemptuously, “I’m not surprised, honestly.”

“I should kill you right now.” Wisdom spat.

“And I should kill you for what you did to my kids! I still may!” Chapman yelled with a fury that took even Wisdom back. Chapman, realizing that perhaps now certainly wasn’t the time to lose his temper, took several deep breaths to calm himself, “Don’t you even want to know why I’m here and dressed in this uniform?”

“I don’t give a bloody fuck. You’re a dead man.” Pete warned as he kept his weapon trained on Chapman, “After we gutted your Hellfire Club, SHIELD tossed the place. We got enough to put you away for the rest of your natural life.”

“Oh, that? I’m afraid that it was my evil clone who did all those nasty things, who imprisoned me in a stasis chamber. I recently freed myself,” Chapman explained sarcastically while making a dismissive gesture with his free hand, “and oh so want to redeem my good name!”

“You’ve lost the plot.” Wisdom observed matter of factly.

“Oh no, I haven’t. Doctors have even examined me, and will testify that I have never once had cybernetic implants.” Chapman then holstered his weapon, even though Wisdom kept his trained on the former Union Jack, “Care to know how I’m redeeming my good name?”

“Good name? That’s a joke.” Wisdom scoffed

“You’re not one to talk, mate. You’ve killed more men than I’ll ever know, and destroyed more lives than me too. Dallas Roirdan ring any bells? Just how hard did you fight the Shadow King, eh?”

Wisdom was silent

“As I was saying, I’m redeeming my good name. I’m the new director of the United Nations strikeforce Excalibur, officially announced tomorrow.” Chapman smiled wickedly at Wisdom, “I wanted it to be a surprise for you.”

Wisdom’s eyes went wide at that revelation. He’d heard about Excalibur’s botched mission into Latveria, based on faulty information and eventually leading to the strikeforce being reorganized. Wisdom had even looked into who could have fed SHIELD that misinformation. Wisdom instantly knew he didn’t have to look any farther now.

“Bloody hell…”

Chapman knelt down closer and whispered so that only Wisdom could hear him now, “Care to know how I pulled it off?”

“Like I could stop you?” Wisdom asked thru gritted teeth

“Probably not. It was thanks to Black Air, actually.” Chapman said with a sinister grin, “how soundly do you think our countrymen would sleep if they knew the full scope of Black Air’s dealings? That a former member of Excalibur and current leader of X-Force was responsible for the death of every man, woman and child in a quaint, defenseless little town? Ronsaphan, wasn’t it? Peace of mind carries a very, very heavy price in these trying times, mate.”

“You bast…” Wisdom didn’t get a chance to finish. In one fluid motion, Chapman snatched Wisdom’s weapon out of his grip with his left hand while Chapman’s right hand slammed down on the side of Wisdom’s head, smashing it into the hardwood floor, causing Wisdom’s vision to swim. Chapman twirled Wisdom’s weapon in his hand easily and then stopped, and slammed the side of the weapon into Wisdom’s face. Chapman twirled it again, stopped and leveled it at the former Black Air agent.

“This is only the start, Wisdom. So watch your arse.” Chapman threatened as he stepped back, the light gleaming off the barrel of Wisdom’s stolen weapon.

“You really thing you can turn those tossers against me?” Wisdom laughed as he painfully brought himself into a standing position and wiped away the blood on his mouth and nose, “I’ve worked with them, you stupid wanker. They’re not like you. They’re heroes.”

“They’re patriots, Wisdom.” Chapman corrected, “Like me. And who says I need them? I hope by now you’ve learned that I’m a very, very resourceful man.”

“Doesn’t matter. I’ll still kill you dead as horse shit.” Wisdom hissed

“Oh no you won’t. I’m protected from on high, Wisdom, while you’ve burned nearly every bridge you’ve come across. You cross my backers, and you’ll be lucky if they only put a bullet between your eyes.” Chapman emptied the magazine of Wisdom’s weapon and tossed it back to him. “Be seeing you around, you can be sure of that. Delphi? Get us out of here.”

The silver haired woman nodded in acknowledgement, “Yes, sir.”

“Oh, and Wisdom? That drug Delphi slipped you? It only thing it causes gas. I thought it was fitting.” Before Wisdom could fully absorb this information, Chapman and Delphi had disappeared, taken away by the familiar signature of the Excalibur HERMES system.

Wisdom stood in the wreckage of the bar, as patrons (those not disabled by Delphi’s fists and feet) stared at him in confusion and sympathy. Ignoring them, Wisdom limped over to the bar, set his former stool upright and sat down.

“I need a drink.”

“What…would you like to drink?” The barkeeper asked hesitatingly

“The entire… fucking… bar.” Wisdom said in all seriousness

A holographic image of the planet earth hovered in the center of an otherwise lightless room, its holographic image providing the only light for the two hulking figures, who regarded the image with obvious distain. Light was a luxury to these alien warriors, who preferred the darkness. It complimented their nature nicely, and wasn’t a drain on their resources.

“It looks so weak, the planet earth, doesn’t it my friend?” The first figure asked. His voice was throaty and deep, like gravel speaking, not a man and rife with obvious impatience “almost like clay.”

“Perhaps that is because, to you, the planet is clay, a plaything for you to shape.” The second figure replied. His voice was as gruff as his companion’s, but it was laced with a certain patience that commanded the respect of his fellow.

“Perhaps. But the inhabitants of this accursed planet have long irritated me, and you. I would just as soon destroy it as pillage it.”

“Who’s to say we can’t do both?”

Malevolent laughter filled the chamber and hallways of the ship for sometime as both warriors reveled in the thought of destroying the planet that vexed the both of them for so long, without a single finger until it was all over.

Next Issue: An arms race unlike anything the world has ever seen.